Shaunti Feldhahn

Register Today

To post to this forum you must first register with this site. If you are already registered, click here to login.

Forums
Subject: I don't know what to do
Prev Next
You are not authorized to post a reply.

Page 1 of 212 > >>
Author Messages
LOGHANDIUser is Offline

Posts:21


01/19/2010 9:15 PM  
Hi my name is logan and I am having trouble understanding a girl. I would greatly appreciate any advice given.

I first met this girl in first grade at my church and instantly grew fond of her. I was and still am a pretty shy guy so I could barely bring myself to talk to her. Years went by and in freshmen year we recieved the same history class and those feelings were still there. The year went by and she showed many signs that she liked me, and they were pretty obvious. I never pursued it because, well, nothing really happens in 9th grade and relationships around me never seemed to work out so I didnt want to try anything.

Now we are halfway through our junior year and, yes, still have those feelings.This time i want to do something,because i feel like something can actually happen, but there is a problem.

Some days she shows signs that she likes me but other days it seems like she wants nothing to do with me. She isnt that same obvious girl she used to be so it is a lot harder to find any signs.Maybe I don't know what exactly the signs are that girls give.

And of course any advice on this would be great, and advice on conversation starters or anything would help because i am a shy guy.

"When excellence is available, good is not enough"
BeckahUser is Offline

Posts:896


01/19/2010 9:59 PM  
well a girl loves it when you tell them they are beautiful.....

"Check yourself before you wreck yourself"
nateynateUser is Offline

Posts:316


01/19/2010 10:07 PM  
That is true Beckah, but i wouldnt recomend it for starting a conversation. Say something like "How you doing?" or "How was your day?" or compliment her shoes or something. Just something little to engage conversation. That should work.

" Wake up oh my soul
wake up and praise the Lord
rise up you sleepy soul
rise up and praise the Lord"

Enter Your Gates
LOGHANDIUser is Offline

Posts:21


01/20/2010 12:02 AM  
Thank you both

I just get so nervous around her and think that whatever I say will sound dumb or something like that

"When excellence is available, good is not enough"
BeckahUser is Offline

Posts:896


01/20/2010 12:20 AM  
when ever i get nervous i try to remember philipians 4:13
"i can do all things through Christ who gives me strength"

"Check yourself before you wreck yourself"
CowCud1992User is Offline

Posts:0

01/20/2010 12:22 AM  
I think that you should maybe take it a little slow. evertually maybe you should just be frank with her and tell her since she is your friend and friends are honest with each other. ahah :) i think your fine around her. know that you have good communication skills so don't worry about talking with her. just talk to her like anyone else. you will do fine.. especially since you've known her for so long. just see how things play out. given im a guy i can only give you so much info. we need some more girls to comment on this and give their input from a female perspective. good luck. p.s. poot. hahahahah(if anyone else is wondering its an inside joke)
LOGHANDIUser is Offline

Posts:21


01/20/2010 12:23 AM  
Thanks Beckah!

That is all that is going to go through my head everytime i get nervous now

That really helps i cant wait to start using everyones advice tomorrow

Thanks again!!!

"When excellence is available, good is not enough"
LOGHANDIUser is Offline

Posts:21


01/20/2010 12:26 AM  
Thanks fishy

that does help a lot. maybe i should tell her. and yeah i have known her so long and i guess i need to talk to her just like every other person in our group.

also agreed that we need more girls to comment

p.s. haha poot

"When excellence is available, good is not enough"
BeckahUser is Offline

Posts:896


01/20/2010 12:28 AM  
good luck!

"Check yourself before you wreck yourself"
AdelynnUser is Offline

Posts:516


01/20/2010 8:26 AM  
haha, my turn =]

I would probably be acting the same way this girl is- if I'm interested in a guy that I've know for years and he didn't act on my signals earlier, I wouldn't keep my hopes up for another two years so if she is still interested, you already have something going for you ;-] I mean I'd have moved on after a while, though I think you're right that in 9th grade not much good happens in romantic relationships =P

So what I'm trying to say is that she may like you, but she doesn't want to keep hoping for something when you haven't been encouraging her to. Which, again, is awesome that you aren't leading her on

"Angel of Mercy, how did you find me? How did you pick me up again? Angel of Mercy, how did you move me, why am I on my feet again?" -One Republic
AdelynnUser is Offline

Posts:516


01/20/2010 8:27 AM  
And Logan, glad you're here =]

"Angel of Mercy, how did you find me? How did you pick me up again? Angel of Mercy, how did you move me, why am I on my feet again?" -One Republic
LizUser is Offline

Posts:341


01/20/2010 11:38 AM  
Ask your parents if you can have the girl and her family over for dinner or games or something. It provides a "safe environment" where you can get to know each other more without spending alot of one-on-one time.

I agree with Adelynn, if I was interested in a guy and he didn't respond, I would lose interest pretty darn quick. Just strike up some more converstions, etc.

BTW Logan, thanks for using correct spelling and punctuation! :P Are you homeschooler?

A girl should be so lost in God that a guy has to go in Him in order to find her
BeckahUser is Offline

Posts:896


01/20/2010 2:43 PM  
i agree with Liz...have her and her family over.

"Check yourself before you wreck yourself"
JoJoUser is Offline

Posts:1657


01/20/2010 4:12 PM  
LOL one thing that comes to mind is something I read in a book called "Bloom" which is a christian guide to growing up... but it says "Remember, You are a child of God and are important to Him! You can hold a convo with anyone."

Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
God Bless!
Mwah XOXO
JoJo
CowCud1992User is Offline

Posts:0

01/20/2010 5:54 PM  
hahahaha Liz Logans not homeschooled. he lives in Vista with me. In fact he's my best bud we hang out everyday. funny huh? :)
BilliamUser is Offline

Posts:12

01/20/2010 7:02 PM  
yo dude. i know what you mean man... i would say just approach her and talk to her. you dont need to be mr. slick.. just be chill enough that you dont pass out infront of. haha. by the way. it seems girls like corny jokes. just saing and liz im a homeschooler.
RoseUser is Offline

Posts:135


01/20/2010 8:56 PM  
Logan-- make sure you pray before you make any moves. You don't want to come across as super flirtatious, but there's nothing wrong with making it obvious that you like her. It's so helpful to me if I'm certain that a guy likes me or not, so I will know how to treat him. This is how I would want a guy to show that he likes me:
1. Offer to carry books for me or open the door for me
2. Compliment my hair (don't say "You're beautiful" out of the blue... that would be super awkward. :\) or say "You look nice today."
3. Just ask how my day's going
4. Ask about my interests, like favorite bands, sports, hobbies
5. Sit by me a lot (lunch, classes)
6. Smiling at me whenever he sees me in the school hall/ at church

Hope this helps!! Ask God to give you the confidence you need and He will not ignore your request. :]

God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of POWER, of LOVE, and of SELF-DISCIPLINE. So do not be afraid to testify about our LORD.
~2 Timothy 1:7-8
RoseUser is Offline

Posts:135


01/20/2010 8:56 PM  
Logan-- make sure you pray before you make any moves. You don't want to come across as super flirtatious, but there's nothing wrong with making it obvious that you like her. It's so helpful to me if I'm certain that a guy likes me or not, so I will know how to treat him. This is how I would want a guy to show that he likes me:
1. Offer to carry books for me or open the door for me
2. Compliment my hair (don't say "You're beautiful" out of the blue... that would be super awkward. :\) or say "You look nice today."
3. Just ask how my day's going
4. Ask about my interests, like favorite bands, sports, hobbies
5. Sit by me a lot (lunch, classes)
6. Smiling at me whenever he sees me in the school hall/ at church

Hope this helps!! Ask God to give you the confidence you need and He will not ignore your request. :]

God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of POWER, of LOVE, and of SELF-DISCIPLINE. So do not be afraid to testify about our LORD.
~2 Timothy 1:7-8
RoseUser is Offline

Posts:135


01/20/2010 8:56 PM  
Logan-- make sure you pray before you make any moves. You don't want to come across as super flirtatious, but there's nothing wrong with making it obvious that you like her. It's so helpful to me if I'm certain that a guy likes me or not, so I will know how to treat him. This is how I would want a guy to show that he likes me:
1. Offer to carry books for me or open the door for me
2. Compliment my hair (don't say "You're beautiful" out of the blue... that would be super awkward. :\) or say "You look nice today."
3. Just ask how my day's going
4. Ask about my interests, like favorite bands, sports, hobbies
5. Sit by me a lot (lunch, classes)
6. Smiling at me whenever he sees me in the school hall/ at church

Hope this helps!! Ask God to give you the confidence you need and He will not ignore your request. :]

God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of POWER, of LOVE, and of SELF-DISCIPLINE. So do not be afraid to testify about our LORD.
~2 Timothy 1:7-8
RoseUser is Offline

Posts:135


01/20/2010 8:57 PM  
oops. sorry about the duplicate posts guys..... :p

God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of POWER, of LOVE, and of SELF-DISCIPLINE. So do not be afraid to testify about our LORD.
~2 Timothy 1:7-8
You are not authorized to post a reply.
Page 1 of 212 > >>




ActiveForums 3.7