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Ophoe
Posts:25
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| 02/20/2009 4:46 PM |
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So, I keep reading all this stuff about liking a guy for who he is and not for shallow reasons, and I agree...but the problem is, then I start worrying maybe I'm only attracted to guys because of selfish reasons, and that seems wrong. I don't think I should force myself to like a guy if I don't...but what about all those perfectly great guys that I don't like because they don't seem
"attractive" enough for me? I don't even have a set kind of guy that I like; I like different personalities/looks. It's more certain types of guys I *don't* like, either for physical/outward reasons or their personality. It really bothers me..I feel guilty about it, but at the same time I want to be free to like whatever guy I want, ya know? Well, anyway, any input? maybe I'm approaching it all wrong?  |
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artyprincess
Posts:226
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| 02/20/2009 5:12 PM |
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You're not going to be attracted to every guy you meet! I certainly wouldn't feel guilty about that. You're naturally going to be attracted to some guys, and not others. I don't think there's any way you can change exactly what attracts you to them, whether it be looks, personality, whatever. I agree that it does sound shallow, but I don't believe it is! They just aren't the guys for you!
Hope that helped! |
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God Can. |
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Adelynn
Posts:189
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| 02/20/2009 8:13 PM |
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| Maybe it's not God's time for you to be with a guy. Maybe it's your time to just be with Him. I know what you mean, though; I've wondered if I'm not with someone because I'm too picky and attracted to the wrong types, or scared and untrusting, or what else could be wrong with me. I think, for me, I just need to live my life right now, and if a guy is in my future, that is where he belongs right now =] It will happen when- and if- it's time |
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"... I will pour out my Spirit upon all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy..." Acts 2.17
What If His People Prayed? |
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Logan
Posts:11
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| 02/20/2009 9:27 PM |
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I personally feel that you should be attracted to a person both emotionally and physically. If you're not attracted to them for whatever reason then there is no point in pursuing a relationship beyond friendship.
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It's the tough things in life that make us who we are, and I'm a sensitive blockhead |
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emilyjanelle
Posts:510
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| 02/21/2009 11:51 AM |
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i agree with everybody. i'm not attracted to anybody in my social circle (which is basically my church) right now and that's okay. i'm not freaked out that, "oh my GOSH why don't i like so-and-so?! he's cute, Godly, friendly, etc.! what's is WRONG with me, God?!"
God puts desires in our hearts for a reason. if you're not attracted to anybody right now, take that as a blessing and let it be. don't go looking for somebody to like, just for somebody to like. i did that for a few months right after my ex and i broke up because i felt lonely and like i had to like somebody, y'know? but God showed me that it is seriously okay to not be attracted to anybody for a while, even a couple years.
don't think you're the only one! :] |
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You may as well come quiet.
- Police Maxim |
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Locke
Posts:223
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| 02/22/2009 4:09 AM |
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There's nothing forcing you to like guys you don't find attractive. Sometimes they just aren't what you're looking for, and IMO that's perfectly all right. I know plenty of very pretty girls, they're smart, love God, and they're great friends, but for me, there's no spark of attraction. What is it? I don't really know. But it's just not there, and so I let any thoughts of romance or dating go. Why waste your energy on a relationship that won't go beyond friendship? (I'm NOT saying don't work at the friendship, just don't force yourself to go beyond that if it's not clicking for you).
And as emilyjanelle shared, it's perfectly all right to be attracted to no one for a while. Singleness isn't a curse, it's a gift we can use. Whether that singleness comes from no boy/girlfriend or husband/wife, either way we can use that time we would've spent on that person with God. |
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It is trifles that make the sum of life. |
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Nicole
Posts:552
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| 02/22/2009 6:37 PM |
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| I agree with Locke, it is okay to be attracted to no one for a while. I was once attracted to my now best friend, but i somehow got over it and lately there have been few guys that i find attractive, and they all have girlfriends, haha. I know someday i want to get married, for now i feel like God hasn't shown me any guys that i'm into dating (I've actually never had a boyfriend in my entire life). Sometimes a friendship with a guy can grow into something more, but in God's time it will come, and His timing isn't our own(BELIEVE me, i know, i'm not the most patient person to live on God's green earth). |
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whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect -Mark Twain |
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kosanchez777
Posts:11
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| 02/22/2009 8:05 PM |
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| 1 word answers all problems patience |
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its hell trying 2 get into heaven |
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