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Forums > Teen Online Forums > Advice From Fellow Readers
Subject: Friends and Boys
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BeccaUser is Offline

Posts:8
05/21/2010 7:28 PM  
   I need advice. I've had this problem latly where my friends get mad at me for talking to the guy they like. It can just be saying hi and I'll get yelled at. I know that they feel threatend by it but I don't understand how a poliet conversation with a guy (usually about sports and video games) turns into me flirting with them. I talk to all guys well i talk to everyone. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong. By talking to a guy would I be giving them the wrong idea? I have good intentions, I just want to make sure he's worthy of dating my friend (never are they worthy) but then they get upset at me.
Grant I.User is Offline

Posts:184
05/22/2010 1:30 AM  
Haha Sometimes you just can't win...If they know you're not going to try to steal their guys, they might be worried that you'll run 'em off because you think they're not good enough for your friends. LOL Don't quit talking to guys just because of what some girls think, but do thoroughly evaluate your motives and make sure there's not something subtle that could cause problems.
BeccaUser is Offline

Posts:8
05/22/2010 12:16 PM  
Thank you for your help, and for the advice.
LizUser is Offline

Posts:341
05/26/2010 10:40 AM  
Hmm... If they're that uptight about their boyfriend they have problems! Isn't that kind of selfish, to pretty much only let your boyfriend talk to you without freaking out?
I was at a dance once, and my friend's boyfriend asked me to dance (she wasn't there) and when I told her about it, she was perfectly ok with it. She knows i don't have any romantic inclinations towards him, and would rather have him dancing with me than some other girl!
I don't know where i'm going with this. :P
A girl should be so lost in God that a guy has to go in Him in order to find her
BeccaUser is Offline

Posts:8
05/26/2010 7:17 PM  
Most of them have never dated. They think that talking to a guy is flirting. If i try to tell them otherwise they yell. It's fun. I just don't know how to make them understand that talking to a guy doesn't mean you like him or that he likes you. Not saying I'm an expert but I tend to catch on and distance myself from a guy if they like me and my friend likes them. They don't get that.
Grant I.User is Offline

Posts:184
05/27/2010 9:49 PM  
Posted By Becca on 05/26/2010 7:17 PM
They think that talking to a guy is flirting. If i try to tell them otherwise they yell. It's fun. I just don't know how to make them understand that talking to a guy doesn't mean you like him or that he likes you.
If I didn't know any better, I'd think your friends were mennonites! LOL
clareUser is Offline

Posts:932
05/28/2010 11:03 PM  
I wrote a long post and it got erased. hate it when that happens!!

I don't think there is anything wrong with you talking to guys! If you're quite certain you don't like them yourself! I know a LOT of people who think talking to a guy is flirting and it made me so mad! I talk to guys, all kinds of guys, and so what! But I was called 'the flirt' and these girls were like "ooh I'm clare's friend" and that like gave them status with the other girls who were too dumb to talk to a guy. If a girl has so many scruples about talking to a guy, then why should she be so offended if some other girl talks to the guy she likes. A guy might like a girl but it's not going to get very far if she won't ever make a move to talk to him! Toughen up and be a woman girls! well not that you should talk to a bunch of guys...but they're here to talk to and be friends with too!

@ Liz, I think it would be awkward to dance with my friend's boyfriend! tho I have danced with my sister's fiancee. He knows I hate physical touch and is always trying to hug me and I yell at my sis to "get your man off of me!!"
LizUser is Offline

Posts:341
05/29/2010 1:58 PM  
@ Clare- It was actually like a line dance, so there wasn't much touching involved. (thank goodness) :)
I have an invisible wall around me that has been growing bigger for years!! I used to hug all my girlfriends, but never guys, and now I really don't like hugging anyone hardly! There were two guys who were hugging me at the same time (AAAH!) trying to "hug the unhuggableness out of you" as they so memorably said it. and I'm just standing there saying "would you Cut It Out!!!" Now I have a bunch of people after me. *sigh*
A girl should be so lost in God that a guy has to go in Him in order to find her
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