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**Jes :-)
Posts:154
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| 05/13/2010 2:41 PM |
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| hey guys if you asked a girl out on a date and that girl wanted you to ask her dad how would you want to be ask? or told? what would make you feel like a man or a fool for asking her? |
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clare
Posts:932
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| 05/14/2010 11:02 PM |
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| good question!!!! |
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**Jes :-)
Posts:154
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| 05/15/2010 7:26 AM |
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| hey guys nobody got any answers....or you still thinking about it?;-) |
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**Jes :-)
Posts:154
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| 05/15/2010 5:28 PM |
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| well clare you think it's a good question and so did i but we sure don't get much response aye! pry got them guys stumped!! lol! |
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Grant I.
Posts:184
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| 05/15/2010 6:25 PM |
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Assuming you personally want to date him, maybe thank him for asking, but tell him that you want to respect your dad's wishes, and that you would like to have your father's blessing before you pursue any relationship. Say it so that the guy knows that you're doing it to respect/honor your dad, not just that you're passing him off to your dad so he can run him off. LOL I'm not sure what to say if you just really don't want to date the guy. I'm not sure whether you should just tell him no, and be done with it, or still refer him to your dad.  I'd probably say send him to dad, especially if it's hard for you to tell guys no. He'll be glad to do it. LOL |
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**Jes :-)
Posts:154
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| 05/15/2010 7:19 PM |
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| good info. i always on the ''edge'' sorta not knowing if something i did or said would make a guy feel manly or just the opposite ''a fool'' i no they get hurt very easily even tho they try to hide it! but ya i would not wanna hurt a guy by turning down their request but i would defiantly not want to lead him on either...i no one of my friends started dating a girl and the girl had already known she didn't really want him...shortly after she turns him down:--P i was so not impressss...like he is very good at covering up how he feels but i'm sure he felt burnt like crazy. i was just so ticked off when i found out about it!! i always want to build up a man's feeling about himself instead of breaking down his self esteem cuz i think that is were a lot of the society's problems come from, to many unaffirmed men and insecure women. men don't feel affirmed and there for there are so many insecure women and it keeps getting worst as time goes on. i think that women feel so insecure and therefore they will run down men more easily and then the men feel like they have no power to protect their self esteem. |
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**Jes :-)
Posts:154
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| 05/15/2010 7:25 PM |
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Posted By Grant I. on 05/15/2010 6:25 PM
Assuming you personally want to date him, maybe thank him for asking, but tell him that you want to respect your dad's wishes, and that you would like to have your father's blessing before you pursue any relationship. Say it so that the guy...
something like this...i highly res[ect your decision to ask me, and i know you have sought the Lords will in it, but i would like to ask you, if you would consider asking my dad first. not that i don't trust you or that he would not trust you but just because i want to respect him as my dad. ???? guys your input.......shoot the post if it's not good!! and tell me whats wrong with it!
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Grant I.
Posts:184
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| 05/15/2010 8:21 PM |
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Your first post is right on! We don't like being turned down by a girl, and it hurts, but we HATE being led on and getting dumped if they knew they didn't want us anyway. Hurt us a little now, instead of compounding it and striking a much bigger blow later.
Works for me! That in itself is "guy filter #1." If he's not serious about you, or knows he isn't the kind of guy for you, etc., he won't even talk to your dad. If he is, he advances to filter #2, asks your dad, your dad asks you, and he walks through filter #3. God should be filters #.5 #1.5, #2.5, and #3.5.  |
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**Jes :-)
Posts:154
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| 05/15/2010 8:30 PM |
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that's what i think to if you are man enough for me then show me that by going to the next step and asking my dad. if you can't do that then you are not worth pursueing...sorry! i just think that it'd start things off the right path if he had to go ask for permission first and it would start things off as a better relationship between him and my dad/parents. which is a big thing to me! and if they simply are out there to have a *fun* date i don't think they would go to the effort of asking. i like your filter idea!;-)
do you as a guy view the 'man world' as ''a society of unaffirmed men and insecure women'' |
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clare
Posts:932
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| 05/15/2010 11:00 PM |
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If a guy asked me and i had no interest I'd tell him no, then tell my dad referring him to my dad when he has no idea how I feel could be a false hope to him. depends on the guy. Wait a sec Grant, something wrong with filter #2....not sure about other dads, but my dad wouldn't tell the girl this guy is interested in her! he would talk to the guy and give him permission (or not) to ask his daughter.
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Grant I.
Posts:184
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| 05/16/2010 12:45 AM |
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Right on Jes! yeah, I think you're right on that. It's a vicious cycle.
Clare, I'm not sure who all does it, but I know that my boss's dad talks to the guys, make up his mind, then tells his daughters that so and so asked to date them, and and asked them if they wanted to, and if they said yes, then he gave the guy the go-ahead. I think both ways can work. |
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JoJo
Posts:1657
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| 05/17/2010 8:19 PM |
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yeah grant, my dad's practically the same, though he does trust me to figure out who's not even worth my time, haha, but I still want them to ask him, as, well, he is my dad lol.
I actually had a "non official" date with a guy I was interested in once, and the very next time I saw him, I had planned on introducing my dad etc, but however, i got so sick that I went through that whold day not really talking at all cuz I felt vile
needless to say, that one didn't work out, but my dad didnt really have anything to do with that haha. My dad has said that he would gladly tell a guy "no" if I didn't wanna date them. but I haven't taken him up on that yet, seeing as most of the guys I've rejected have been like 4 - 6 years younger than me.... YIKES! haha. |
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Turn up the music
Turn it up loud
Take a few chances
Let it all out
'Cause you won't regret it
Lookin' back from where you have been
'Cause it's not who you knew
And it's not what you did
It's how you live
.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.
God Bless!
Mwah XOXO
JoJo |
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